Stories From My Past- Blood and E.T.

Once upon a time, when I was four, I used to love sausage. Every once in awhile my mom would make it for breakfast, and I would dip it in a big pile of ketchup. But then something tragic happened: One lovely morning, my mother forked a couple of steaming sausages onto my plate next to that mountain of magic tomato sauce. As I stabbed that log of meat with my fork and aimed for that delicious ketchup, I stopped. I stared at that red mound. And that was when I realized; Ketchup. Looked. Like. BLOOD. Right then and there, I lost my appetite for ketchup for a good 15 years. Even the smell made my stomach turn, and still does.

Then came along my little sister, who ate ketchup on popcorn and celery and mixed it into her hot chocolate and who knows what else. That wretched child! Anyways, I've gotten over it and I partake of it now. Do not fret.

Something good DID come of that morning, though. We had just gotten some new dark blue mugs which my mom had served cold milk in that morning. I lifted the mug up to my lips to take a drink, and with a start realized that E.T. was staring at me from the bottom of the cup. Nope, it wasn't E.T. It was my distorted image, but it certainly looked like that endearing little alien that I loved so much. I took a long time, sipping away at my milk as E.T. and I talked telepathically. He told me to "Beeeee Goooooood." And I was. I really loved those mugs.

I was a weird kid. And I'm still a weird adult.

stories from my past - a voice lost

Once upon a time, when I was in 9th grade, my english teacher, Mrs. Stevens, lost her voice for months. For no apparent reason. They doctors didn't know what was going on. As her voice got smaller and smaller, the less we listened. So out came the karaoke machine, and she would whisper the entire hour into the microphone. Poor lady!
One day we had an assembly, and as always the teachers were standing in the aisles next to their classes so as to reprimand anyone that was being disruptive.
This particular assembly I was sitting in the aisle seat and Mrs. Stevens was standing right beside me. To my horror, all of a sudden she started smacking her head and shaking it and gyrating about and flailing her arms. This lasted for a good 10 seconds, and then she just stopped, folder her hands in front of her, and proceeded to watch the program as if nothing had just happened.
I stared at her with my mouth open for what seemed an awkward amount of time, trying to figure out what had just happened. But she just gazed toward the front with a slight smile on her face, thoroughly enjoying the spectacular on the stage.
Later on in class I asked if she was okay, and she laughed (which sounded like she was just exhaling loudly over and over) and she informed me that a spider had dropped from the ceiling onto her head.
I have no idea if Mrs. Stevens voice ever came back, but I will always have her to thank for the hilarious image of her silhouette spazzing out in the dark auditorium of Butler Middle School.